*So Infatuated — Everyone has an infatuation. What's yours? *

Wa-wa-we-wah

• Is there a Scarlet Johnsson sex tape out there? Egotastic!
• Heath really needs to eat something green. DListed
• Why are celebrities dying to be cute? CityRag
• Time calls YouTube the best new thing of the year. We aggree. Gawker
• Paris and Nicky back in the day. Celebrity Gossip
• Elisha Cuthbert is the hottest bag lady I've ever seen. Hollywood Tuna

Tom Cruise gets more power? Are you kidding me?

• Tom Cruise is picked to jump on UA's couch. Yikes. Variety
• Borat makes his way to American movie houses tonight. Sexy time! MTV
• Shakira shakes her way into big wins at Latin Grammys. Remember people, her hips don't lie. LA Times.
• Jackson Pollack painting sold for $140 million. Rediff
• Family of Madonna's boy says they visited him. People
• Kanye West throws a fit after losing at MTV Europe Awards. Monsters and Critics
• Indie Actress Adrienne Shelly Found Dead. People
• Nicole Richie: I don't have an eating disorder. San Francisco Chronicle
• Travis Barker regularly 'tongue kisses' Paris Hilton. SAWF
• Tyra Banks crusades against modeling scams. Okay. We. Get. It. ABC

As natural as a gorilla beating his chest

• Believe it or not, Janet Jackson's been in control for 20 years. Popsugar has more details about her new album, 20 YO and her love for JD. Popsugar
• Lokks like Fergie's solo career is "hair" to stay. Hollywood Tuna
• David Hasselhoff's daughter either tried to commit suicide, or got scratched by their family cat. You decide. Hollywood Rag
• Could it be? Does Kimberly Stewart look good? The Skinny Website
• Sometimes, the Beckhams looks like regular, super-humanly attractive family. Celebworld
• Julia Roberts' family outing. TMZ
• Lindsay Lohan's dad has to send her messages on...mini flashcards...from his jail cell. Stay in school kids. Sun
• Kylie Minogue has written her first book and it's as adoreable as you'd think. Amazon
• The Facebook in talks to sale site to yahoo for $1 billion dollars. Hollywood Jesus
• Paris Hilton promotes canned wine. What more could you ask for? Splash

She is my sister. She is number four prostitute in whole of Kazakhstan.

• From the X-Files to the What-the-hell-files: David Duchovney has turned into Agent Sweaty Ass. Dlisted
• Prison Break hottie Wentworth Miller's hips don't lie yo! Just Jared
• Kevin Federline only has 26 years left to live. A Socialite's Life
• Jessica Simpson plays Giesha. IDLYTW
• Architectual Digest will be the hottest thing since no-carb bread? Jossip
• Even Madonna has bad hair days. Popsugar
• Is Star Jones too skinny these dasys? The Skinny Website

Bare naked and I, just can't take it

• I see London, I see France. I see Lindsay Lohan SANS underpants. Again. Puke. Pinkisthenewblog
• Paris Hilton and Travis Barker picture together again. They deserve eachother. People
• More details on the second Spederline birth. Washington Post
• Anna Nicole Smith's lawyer said she was so "distraught" over her son's death she had to be sedated. His death is being called suspicious. Forbes
• In case you didn't already hear. LonelyGirl15 was...not 15. Stuff.co
• You guys, Nicole Richie really wants you to stop making fun of her for being a bag of bones. Make that a dime bag. China Daily
• Girls Gone Wild! creator cops a plea. E! Online
• Zooey Deschanel and Kate Boseworth have to be sharing diet secrets. Like not eating. Skinny Website

Where were YOU this weekend?

• AOL premieres NBC's Twenty Good Years and the steamy Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip online before the shows even debut on television. Just another reason to love my Macbook. Reuters
• More on the strange Anna Nicole Smith "gives birth to daughter, looses 20-year-old son to unexpected death" story. E! Online
• Toronto Film Festival showcases film about Bush's imagined assassination. No comment. Huffington Post
• Sean Combs forced to drop "Diddy" name in the U.K. Oh, by another name he'll be as sweet. Chocolate Magazine
• Lindsay Lohan's lost Hermes bag, which contained about $1 million worth of jewels, is found and the thiefs are captured. All is right in the world. Life, Style, Extra
• Sorry Jessica, he's over you! Nick Lachey says he's "in love" with Vanessa. Post Chronicle
• Whitney Huston works up a sweat while putting together her "comeback" album. Digital Spy
• Steve Irwin laid to rest in small, hometown funeral. All Headline News

'Ahh, she's a beauty!'...RIP Irwin

• Crikey! The world's lost the best Crock Hunter we could ask for. Zany Steve Irwin killed by stingray. Oh how I wish it were the worst episode of P'unked ever. The Australian
• Kelly Obsorne wasn't really married. She just has a wedding certificate. Popsugar
• Jessica Alba, new... improved? No backside? The Skinny Website
• Invincible tops the charts again. Los Angeles Times
• People are still talking about Tom apologizing to Brooke. E!
• Rocker Pete Doherty's sentence postponed. Reuters
• Ellen DeGeneres and girlfriend Portia de Rossi lightly injured in crash with a drunk driver. Good news is season three of de Rossi's show Arrested Development came out. Playfuls

Even though the god's are crazy, even though the links are blind

• Don't you worry Jessica Simpson lost her voice, not her boobies. People
• In case you didn't hear, more people know the names of Snow White's seven dwarves than supreme court justices. Get it together people. Cornell
• So are Nicole Richie and Brody Jenner a couple or not? Just Jared
• Hasn't Alyssa Milano dated enough basball players? Hollywood Tuna
• Faris Buller took a day off, fell off his horse. IDLYTW
• Do you have $4.4 million? Buy the Olsen twin's LA home. Celebrity Nation
• It's official, Paris Hilton's music is total crap. Egotastic!
• Lady Madonna moves Moscow. Popsugar

My London London bridge is falling down

Just Jared has the full story about Heather Locklear's nearly nude public appearance. Hey, she still looks pretty good, right?

Sadly, Christina isn't dirrrty, or fugy any more. Oh wait, Britney took that job. Go Fug Yourself

Ever wonder what Sienna Miller looks like in a Bikini? Rent Alfie or check out one of the best blogs ever: The Skinny Website

What's worse, Mischa Barton's thigh or her beau Cisco Adler? (Do I smell some photoshop work?) Hollywood Tuna

Get your Project Runway update in case you were doing something constructive Wednesday night. Pink is the new blog

Paris Hilton is far more tolerable when drowned out by Japanese influences. Defamer

Lube up those muscles, it's time for your links

Laguna Beach seaon 3 begins tonight...Catch all the drama with the second generation of Conrad's and wonder why 15 year olds are wearing $500 Chanel sunglasses. Good times. Laguna Beach Hookup

Nick Lachey would rather live with Satan. IDLYTW

Kevin Federline will make more babies if he has his way. Hollywood Rag

Pink is bald and beautiful? Popsugar

Note to Lindsay: Crack totally affects your sense of style. DListed

Uma Thurman bikini shots. It's bootilicious. The Skinny Website

David Copperfield has found the fountain of youth. Defamer

City Slickers star Bruno Kirby dies at age 57. TMZ

Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards' divorce is finalized. Dana's Dirt

Lindsay Lohan likes casual sex. Hollywood Tuna